Disclaimer: The following document fragment is presented from an in-character perspective, it should not be taken as the truth of the setting.
Context: Have a more humorous post. In this excerpt we see a slightly confused translation of some alien text concerning the avoidance of “human predators”. Perhaps the text itself is a hoax or an elaborate joke in-universe, or perhaps it is truly the writing of a rare “wish-granting sea-cucumber” sharing its experiences of humanity with its own people.
In the case of confronting the human predator, the most important thought to keep in mind is not to panic. The human senses your fear and becomes exceptionally aggressive.
If you are confronting only a single or pair of humans, it is usually enough to expunge your gas bladder upon the human. Of course, this will cause a loss of buoyancy for ??? (period, two months?), but it should be enough to dissuade the human from pursuit. Then you can hide and refill your bladder over time.
The best effect is achieved if you aim for the human’s sensory appendage, which is located at the top of the human. In case you are having problems orientating, it is the short appendage. A good shot of buoyancy gas should leave the predator confused or even reeling on the ground. At this point, it is best to flee at the highest speed possible.
If encountering a larger group of human predators or the humans are equipped with a gas protection device, we advise ejecting your ??? (I have no idea, really) organ at them. This is understandably traumatic, but it is preferable over death or enslavement by the human predator.
Be sure to expel your ??? (same organ) directly onto the humans to cause as much confusion as possible. You should note them making strange noises, which means your strategy is most likely working. Finish ejecting everything so that you do not pull the humans behind you. That would be counterproductive to escaping from them.
In case of capture attempt to parley with the humans. They are easily swayed with promises of metals and crystals, especially in large quantities. Promise more than you can provide if you have to and try to use the resulting confusion to escape once more.
Remember that humans are persistent and do not return to an area containing humans, at least until you fully recover from any gas or organ loss.
Esoteric Musings... 